[CH] A great new all purpose condiment

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Alright,  I have been perusing the list over the past couple of
days.  (I had a couple of servers blow up on me, so I have been
perusing at night as well)  And, I believe that I have come up
with the all purpose recipe :

Hurley's GooAll

.5 gallon	 	Poi
2  medium blocks	Tofu
12 bottles		Beer (Red Hook, or the like)
1  small		banger
1  tsp 			Really crappy English mustard 
			(any brand of English mustard will do)
2  small tins		Spam
2  cup 			Habaneros
			Spackle to taste

First, drink 10 bottles of beer, saving the empty bottles.
Mash Habs with the heel of your hand then fry them up, while 
making sure that you are in a poorly ventilated cooking area.
Then take the Habs and boil them in 2 Quarts of water.  
Touch eyes frequently.  Cut tofu into small cubes and mix 
together with the poi.  Cut the Spam in thin slices and fry 
them up.  Take the leftover Spam juice and add to Hab. stock.
Mix the Poi-Tofu mixture together with the spam and add to the
Hab stock.  Cook up the banger, add the crappy English mustard.
Eat the banger while drinking the 11th beer.  Take the 12th beer
spill some for the CH'ers and add the rest to the pot.  
Spackle to taste, and take off the burner.  Place empty bottles 
at every corner of your house. Blend the mixture until it is creamy
smooth.  Then use as garnish, dip, sauce, or purple paint.
As a food item it isn't that great, although it does have a certain
appeal.  However, as a paint it is great!  It will prevent barnacles
from growing on your walls, destroy snails, give cockroaches mental 
illness, and keep away moles.  Lastly, if you paint pictures of Barney,
you can tell your children that each time they sing that $#@*&%* song
that they have to lick the Barney.

Disclaimer:  I am not responsible if you make this.  I tried to make it,
but
             I drank all the beer before I could get started.

What I made instead:

2 Tbls		Olive Oil
3 Drops		Daves Insanity
1 Tbls		Country Style Dijon Mustard
1 Tbls		Horseradish Sauce (Beaver)
3 Tbls		Wine Vinigar
		Spices to taste (Italian.. aka Oregano and pepper)

I mixed it all together and put it on a salad... it was ok.
Touched my eye though... You know habs really are hot. o^/


Hurley (Master Chef, but only a Journeyman Baiter)

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