[CH] Doug's Evil Cookies

Andy (quark@erols.com)
Sun, 03 Dec 2000 17:14:13 -0500 

OK.  
By popular request I'll give the recipe for Doug's Evil Cookies.
These first appeared at Chip Welsh's Hotluck in Red Lion, PA this year.
On her first sampling of one of Doug's cookies, Tammy Porter 
(normally a quiet CH) loudly exclaimed:
"Doug!  What you have done to these (innocent) chocolate chip cookies
is evil, Evil, just simply EVIL!."  The name promptly stuck.

By popular request they were remade for Karen's TV hotluck in
Warren, NJ. Photos on my website

However, read my cautionary story below.

1) Start with you favorite chocolate chip / Toll-House cookie recipe.
Enough for 48 medium size cookies.

2) In the dry powder mix, add three heaping teaspoons of *smoked* 
habanero powder. (Doug and I use Jim Campbell's' applewood-smoked,
Red Savina powder.  Jim Weaver's smoked chocolate habanero powder
is, well, fairly smokin' also.)  Be sure to *blend thoroughly* with
the dry mix.

3) 20 drops of PurCap.  Do not attempt to add to the dry powder or
batter. PurCap is oil based.  Add to the shortening. We use real
butter.  Had to melt it, then thoroughly mix the PurCap, then let
the butter semi re-solidify before using.

WARNINGS  
1) When baking, use plenty of ventilation -- any normal members of 
your family would probably not appreciate gauging and eyes tearing. 
2) Also best to secure the baking pan used away from the normal kitchen
area.  Doug thought he had sufficiently cleaned the cookie pan,
but hadn't.  Sandy, intending to make normal cookies for the rest of
the family obtained cookies that - well - weren't normal.
Doug caught hell from Sandy and all three boys.
3) These have a delayed heat, 5 to 10 seconds.  A fast cookie muncher
could get his/her self into big trouble before realizing it.

ADDITIONAL
For the extremists amongst us, I offer two more suggestions.

1) Add a dollop of rich vanilla ice cream on top of a Evil Cookie,
then darken the top of the ice cream with some more hab powder.
Sort of like taking the poison and the antidote at the same time.

2) OK, I know that there are a few really extreme out there
-- you know who you are.  When baking, after the dough flattens,
but before it is done baking, generously sprinkle some Blair's
Death Rain on top of selected cookies. (Remember which.) 
WARNING! remove from oven during sprinkling, lest the oven's
convection currents put the powder in your face and eyes.
NOTE that the powder will tend to form clumps on top, producing
interesting hot spots -- even for the experienced CH.

TRUE STORY
These are definitely not intended for "ordinary" people. 
A non-CH, not having an appreciation of extreme heat, 
may not "believe" or understand the sign.

This happened at my workplace.   My co-workers know that I am a CH.
(They've asked about this brown powder I sprinkle on my chicken salad
and the drops I carefully put in my soup.) Before setting out the
Evil Cookies, I sent out cautionary email, put out a sign with 
"Evil Cookies", "Danger - Beware", "Chilehead level extreme heat",
with skull and crossbones (normally reserved for poison), and set
out another sign: "For Emergency: Milk is in frig".
 -- fairly safe and responsible, Yes? --> NOT!

One poor fellow, didn't read the email, saw the sign - but had no
concept that anything could be that hot, especially so innocent looking
as a chocolate chip cookie, and, unfortunately, was also lactose
intolerant (couldn't drink milk.)  - he was in PAIN for 15-20 min.

Fortunately, he didn't complain to his (and my) boss.

On the other hand, one young woman, picked a whole cookie, munched
into it, said:  my, these are really spicy.  Can I have another?
Somewhat astonished, I explained CHs to her. She didn't know
about CHs or that she was one!  Thought she was just peculiar.

Andy