Re: [CH] No more
Scott Peterson (scottp4@mindspring.com)
Sat, 21 Jul 2001 22:43:31 -0700
At 04:00 PM 7/21/01 -0600, you wrote:
>I want to unsubscribe from chile-heads. Now.
To unsubscribe from this list, you must first purchase a
Craft-O-Matic Adjustable List Cancellation Unit. The unit can
be obtained from most hardware stores and dental clinics. Be sure to
obtain the proper permits to operate the unit from the Nuclear
Regulatory Commission and the Food and Drug Administration in Washington
D.C. USA.
Be sure to carefully unpack the kit and place each component in its
accompanying mesh safety bag. Mount the Pershing DF4 resonator on top of
the perforated Gerring Mach 77 refibulator and attach them using the
eight-millimeter torque fork. Be sure that the refibulator is mounted at
a 66 degree angle and properly dispersed so that it is flush with the
curved section of the Pyrex thistle tube. Place the four sections of the
triangular separation gear into the posture cylinder and lock them into
place using the band aid adhesive strip. Insert the wiggling pin into
the wobbling hole, making sure that it seated correctly. Place the D
cell battery and the eleven 9 volt batteries in the power chamber.
The device should be calibrated before operation using the optional
digital corkscrew accessory pack prior to operation. Insert the digital
corkscrew through the electronic combustion service chamber using
caution not to touch the reinforced tungsten igniter control module and
quickly turn the inverter drive to 28.6 degrees.
Turn the Craft-O-Matic Adjustable List Cancellation Unit
upside down and hit the bottom plate with a 48-ounce ball-peen hammer
while shaking the unit vigorously. Force open the door to the
incineration valve compartment and set the pressure gauge to 719 psi.
Close the door and seal it shut with duct tape.
The unit should now be properly calibrated and ready to use.
Before activating the Craft-O-Matic Adjustable List
Cancellation Unit, you must first elevate it to a height of 229 feet
above sea level to insure that the unit receives the proper oxygen level
and barometric pressure. Point the aerial to 17 degrees north by
northeast to within the parameters of the Telstar GS-2 weather satellite
and apply pressure to the wing shaft on the southern most section of the
modular accelerator. Using the special ratchet adapter supplied with the
unit, rotate the heater core to the "on" position.
The "on" position has been obtained when the green light begins to
flash, signifying that the red light is about to go off. Once the red
light is off, flip the toggle switch labeled "ON/OFF" to the "ON"
position and count to 47 before logging on to the system. Logon using
your username and password and wait for the prompt. Once prompted you
must check the box with the appropriate action you wish to take and then
press the pressure release button and turn off the compressor while
turning the hand crank at 231 meters per minute.
Next, press control, alt, delete, caps lock, shift, number lock, escape
and tab simultaneously.
Press enter.
You will have one second to complete the procedure. If you fail to
respond in the time limit allowed, simply purchase a new Craft-O-Matic
Adjustable Newsgroup List Cancellation Unit and start from the
beginning.
Please remember that this is the only way we will accept for you to
unsubscribe from this service. We have made every attempt to simplify
the procedure for your convenience. Failure to comply with the
unsubscribe policy will result in immediate termination of your
subscription so please follow the above directions closely.
As an alternative, quickly refer to the subscription notice you received
when you subscribed.
Hint: It starts "Please save this message for future reference".
It says, in part,
If you ever want to remove yourself from this mailing list,
send the following command in email to
<chile-heads-request@globalgarden.com>:
unsubscribe
Scott Peterson
--
"Placebos raise a problem in these days of the pharmacist
labeling pill bottles with their contents. One cannot admit
that the pill is nothing but sugar if it is to work, so a fancy
brand name is needed. Among the proposals made for what
to name a brandname placebo are Confabulase, Gratifycin,
Deludium, Hoaxacillin, Dammitol, Placebic Acid and Panacease."