[CH] What a week!

Jonathan T. Smillie (jsmillie@protix.com)
Sat, 06 Jun 1998 16:46:03 -0500

Well, the reason this week started off lousy isn't chile-related, but it didn't put me in a good mood. A trip to Pennsylvania that was supposed to take 7 hours took 25, putting me a day behind on work and messing up the schedule for the rest of the week. On top of that, I couldn't connect to my ISP's local dialup until Thursday. Four DAYS without the Chile-Heads list! I was chile-deprived (or was that depraved?)...

However, on Thursday I finally got my 127 backlogged messages. Among them- BIgtom's Chile-Head graphic and a great assortment of chile images from Doug (Senor Chile Monger). Both of these brightened up my week no end. Thanks, guys! 

But the best part was waiting for me at home today. I returned to find a pile of mail on the desk. Then I noticed that the "pile" was mostly one box. Then I noticed that the label on the box was from Mild to Wild Pepper Company. 

"That arrived right after you left," my SO said. "What is it?" 

I was nearly as mystified. I knew I hadn't ordered anything from Jim, so what could this be? Then an idea, a hope, started to form...Was it? Could it be? I sliced the box open eagerly, threw aside the packing paper and there it was... THE BREAD, nestled safely in its ziploc baggie. 

Needless to say, there was no delay. To unzip the baggie, remove the enticing slice, and cut off a sliver was the work of a second. Before tasting, however, I simply savored the dense, fruity, yeasty aromas. MMMM. This smelled like good bread even WITHOUT that sneaky Red Savina tang. Finally, anticipation overcame appreciation. I put the slice in my mouth, chewed, and swallowed...

I've never been a religious man, but now I know what all the fuss about this Communion stuff is. The nutty, slightly sweet flavor hit before the heat, but the Red Savinas weren't far behind. My face flushed, and a trail of steadily growing warmth enveloped my tongue, snaked down my throat, and settled in a fiery but pleasant ball in my stomach. At that point I achieved Enlightenment: 

	There is no God but El Grande, and Jim Campbell is his Prophet.

The Burn lasted a good ten minutes. I've had two more slivers since then, and each one has been just as good as the first. I'm husbanding the rest, though... wouldn't do to degrade the experience with gluttony.

Congratulations, Jim. The BREAD lives up to everything I'd heard of it. I propose that hereafter, the ceremony of the BREAD be named the First Sacrament of El Grande, and be practiced at all Chile-Head gatherings. Do I have a second? 	



<bold>Conservative</bold>, <italic>n.</italic> A statesman who is
enamored of existing

evils, as distinguished from the Liberal, who wishes to 

replace them with others.

- Ambrose Bierce, <italic>The Devil's Dictionary</italic>