[CH] Long Forgotten Poem
Jeff (jeff@ulupica.com)
Tue, 20 Oct 2009 20:15:01 -0500
Here's a little ditty I wrote way back in 1998 (I just located a copy of one
of the first websites I ever made called Pepperman's Capsicum Carnival) I
thought the site was long gone but it's still sitting out there on an
obscure free hosting site. I believe it was just after I tasted Jim
Campbell's "The Bread", back when he would send samples of it to random
folks on the list;
Enjoy (or not) :)
Jeff
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Dueling ChileHeads
Edward had a new hot sauce
He tested it on Fred.
When Fred had eaten all of it,
He wished that he were dead.
Fred felt it flare within his gut
He said, "I'm such a fool."
And when it reached his sorry butt,
Fred wished for something cool.
"A Popsicle is what I need!"
He shouted through the door.
"I read about it on some list,
Though I'm not sure what it's for."
Now by this time Fred wasn't sure
What was and wasn't there.
He started to hallucinate,
His psyche was laid bare.
He thought he heard a Hendrix tune,
Fred started in to sway.
Right then and there Fred knew for sure...
TOMORROW ED MUST PAY!
Fred awoke, and then got up,
And tried to clear his head.
"Today's the day, I make Ed pay!"
It's time to make THE BREAD"
He stumbled toward the kitchen door,
He got out what he needed.
"When Eddy tastes this little treat,
My victory's conceded!"
That afternoon Fred went and knocked
Upon Ed's big front door.
He said to Ed, "This bread's for you,
To show that I'm not sore."
"It's nice and light, and tasty too!"
Fred had said to Ed.
And before that day came to an end...
Ed would eat THE BREAD.
It came to pass upon that day,
Ed had a heart attack.
They tried to pin it all on Fred,
For making such a snack.
The HazMat Team was called to town,
To pick up all THE BREAD.
And from now on all the storage costs
Must be paid by Fred.
The moral of my little tale,
Of cruel and vengeful folks,
Is
"NEVER USE A PEPPER FOR PULLING STUPID JOKES!"